


White Static

by extentia



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Sad, Well - Freeform, but stiles dies heads up, graphic depiction of the mind during death, no happy ending, sort of a happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-27
Updated: 2016-05-27
Packaged: 2018-07-10 11:11:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6982033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/extentia/pseuds/extentia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles has blood in his mouth. He can taste it, ichor and salt. Something that isn’t him, but “it has to be, right, Der? It’s me. It’s me rejecting the bite. Oh, god. Oh god. Oh my god, I’m not ready for this not now not – “</p><p>           He chokes on his words, on the fluid that sprays all over his chest, his shirt. Coughing, cough, coughing. He grimaces and wipes the offending sludge on his forearm. Black blood. Black. Blood. He should have known better! He tries to say as much but nobody’s paying any attention. Which, rude, really. He’s leaking! Like that old faucet his dad took three years to fix after his mom –</p>
            </blockquote>





	White Static

           Stiles has blood in his mouth. He can taste it, ichor and salt. Something that isn’t him, but _“it_ _has to be, right, Der? It’s me. It’s me rejecting the bite. Oh, god. Oh god. Oh my god, I’m not ready for this not now not – “_

           He chokes on his words, on the fluid that sprays all over his chest, his shirt. Coughing, cough, coughing. He grimaces and wipes the offending sludge on his forearm. Black blood. Black. Blood. He should have known better! He tries to say as much but nobody’s paying any attention. Which, rude, really. He’s leaking! Like that old faucet his dad took three years to fix after his mom –

           Fuck, now his dad isn’t going to have him. Again, his dad’s gonna lose the person he loves most in the world. Except this time, he has Scott and the pack to pick up the pieces. Stiles couldn’t do that the first time – not like his dad needed, anyway. He has the pack to watch out for him now. It’ll hold him together, probably. It’s gonna have to be enough. That thought stings Stiles.

           “Guys,” Stiles chokes out, “Um, I don’t know, guys, I think…” He has to snort blood up his nose and down his throat to keep breathing clearly. _And oh, god are those tears_? 

        “Guys, someone, please.” His voice cracks and he screws his eyes up. This was not the way. This wasn’t supposed to be how it ended. He had a plan, damn it! He even started to think about could-be’s! He was beginning to be surer than ever he’d grow old. He imagined a life with his pack - where he lived until he needed a cane, until he was covered in wrinkles and complaining about the weather. He’s supposed to have a lover at some point! Maybe even a kid. Sometimes, he imagines a faceless woman with dark brown hair, cascading in waves down her back. He has to tie it up for her when it gets muggy out. She’s always missing strands when she does it without a mirror.

        Sometimes, he imagines Derek holding his hand, sitting on the back of their porch during dusk, and during dawn. Sometimes he imagines how they could live in marital bliss for all their years together.

         He had stopped imagining life in the future when he stopped dreaming of his future with Lydia, back during his sophomore year when everything went to shit. But the fantasies came back much later with other people in the starring roles. There was a plan, god damn it. He had a plan and now it hardly matters.

           He remembers Allison like this, in the same position he’s in now. Scott told him about it, after they’d trapped the Nogitsune, of course. But Scott never really got into the meat of it – gave Stiles the hard to chew details, until long after. Stiles swears if he accidentally says, “It’s okay.” he’ll have to stone himself. To death!

           He laughs aloud, and shit, those must be the endorphins. He’s too loud. He’s hurting his own ears with his manic, unending laughter. It’s almost surreal until he chokes on his blood again.

           “Fuck,” he moans. His arm’s starting to tingle. What a weird feeling. It’s like a sunny day, like wind picking up, rattling the leaves and tree branches above him. Except this is his body. And he’s not even going to be in it much longer.

           He shouldn’t echo Allison in his last breaths but god damn it, he can’t help it.

           “Tell my dad, I love him. You gotta take care of him. He’s gonna be so messed up over this,” Stiles begins. Scott’s finally by his side, he tries valiantly to find the wound, to staunch it.

           “I think it’s a little late for that.” Stiles tries to grin, to keep the atmosphere light. He doesn’t question why he’s doing it. Is it for him? Is it for Scott? “’M rejecting the bite. Always figured I would go out with a bang, though. ‘T’s falling a bit flat, huh?”

           “Stiles, shut up, you’re going to be fine.” Scott tries, grabbing Stiles’s hand. “You’re gonna be fine. You can just do one of your magic things, right, and fix this?”

           Stiles shakes his head and mumbles a negative, looking every bit as pained from the admission as he is from his body’s rejection of the rival Alpha’s bite. Scott turns away from Stiles, talking to the woods behind him, “Derek get the car! We have to get him to Deaton.”

           “I can run him to the clinic faster than I could get the car.” Derek appears in Stiles’s line of sight, eyebrows furrowed and face carefully blank.

           “Run me to the clinic? What d’you think I ‘m? A package?”

           “Stiles…” Scott trails off, “I don’t…”

           “It’s a bit late for that too, huh?” Stiles wipes at his mouth again. “’M startin’ to feel pretty heavy, you know. Can’t be too good’ve a sign. ‘M spirit’s sinking into the earth.”

           Stiles starts laughing again, chest heaving painfully. He sobers with a particular throb that hits from his heart down to his navel. “There’s no magic that can fix me. I thought – I always thought -” He cuts himself off.

           “It’s not too late.” Derek interjects. “Scott. Get out of the way, now. Or pick him up. I don’t care. You can’t just sit there!”

           He looks two seconds away from pushing Scott away into the nearest tree and taking off with Stiles, and no matter what Stiles thought he wanted, he doesn’t want to die in the middle of a desperate attempt to run somewhere they won’t even reach.

           “He’s lost too much blood, Derek.” Scott says for Stiles, “There’s not really a point.”

           Then, quieter, “We can just make him comfortable now. There’s nothing else.”

           Derek doesn’t look like he knows what to say. Scott is stroking Stiles’s hair back from his face like Stiles’s mother used to when he was bed ridden. Was it chicken pox? Or a fever? There was one time his mother sat bedside him for what felt like eternity, he was sweaty and uncomfortable the whole time. He remembers that. And she stroked his hair back, whispering over and over, _‘It’s going to be okay, sweet boy. It’ll be fine.’_

Stiles got to repay the favor when she was wasting away. Even when she forgot him, and didn’t want him to touch her, she still fell asleep. She slept heavily, drugs providing her with the rest she didn’t remember she needed, allowing Stiles to climb up in the hospital bed with her. He remembers touching her face – just trying to commit everything from her breathing to her skin tone to memory. He can’t readily recall it now. He can’t remember.

           “Do you believe in heaven, Scotty,” Stiles coughs again, “because I just don’t know.”

           Scott just grips his hand tighter. Derek looks away. This is gonna tear them both apart. _Oh, god,_ he realizes he doesn’t know what to do.

           “Scott, I don’t know, Scott.” Stiles lets out a cry, fat tears dripping down his face, “I don’t know, Scott.”

           The heaving sobs don’t leave much room for breathing, or talking, and Stiles doesn’t feel normal. He doesn’t feel like he thinks he should. What if they don’t remember him the way he can’t remember his mom right now? What about his dad? One of Scott’s tears drip onto his face. He can’t see Derek anymore. Maybe he left.

           “I love you, Scotty boy. Scotty, Scott-Scott.” He’s still playful. He can’t make his arm move up to wipe the snot off his upper lip. _Oh._

“’N I love you too, Derry Der Bear.” Stiles tries to clear his throat for a long minute. “The whole pack, y’gotta tell ‘em okay? I love ‘em all.”

           “All’ve ‘m, okay?” Stiles clarifies.

           “Yeah, Stiles, you love us all. They’ll all know. I’ll tell them, okay? I’ll let everybody know.”

           “Mm,” Stiles acknowledges, eyes shutting for a moment. “’M tired ‘n’ ‘m hurt, Sc’tt.”

           Scott’s saying something again. Stiles can’t make out the words. Everything is coming through a thick static. _This is probably the sound white light makes,_ Stiles considers. _An old television set. Watching cartoons with Scott, his mom gives them both breakfast cereal. ‘Don’t spill on the couch! And don’t tell your father!’ He and Scott laugh. Melissa picks Scott and Stiles up from school, they’re all laughing. He can’t remember the joke._

_He can’t remember why he’s thinking about Scott. Melissa’s so nice. Mm, and those hands in his hair. Breathe in, it’s getting heavy. Breathe in, it’s getting heavy. The white noise. The static. Cartoons with Scott. What was that show they watched on Saturday nights? He loves that cartoon. Loves those Saturday nights. Loves Scott. God, he’s so happy. He’s so happy. He’s – The static noise – Cartoons with Scott – A static sea, ebbing – Cartoons and static – Old televisions – he’s – he – he- he’s –static – static – static – he’s static -_

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on my teen wolf tumblr if u want 
> 
> whitepplsucc.tumblr.com
> 
> also feel free to comment, please! i know my grammar is atrocious so don't JUSt say that lmfao. i mean, unless u have some free, easy to learn resources to help me not succ at grammar so hard u kno?


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